Things here are getting curiouser and curiouser.
I’m being chased around my a girl called Alison.
I’m late but I don’t quite recall what it was that made me so late. I’m thinking a bullet but I could be wrong.
As for this guy, he seems to be completely loopy. His tea party is mayhem. He insists that he is Killkaties when we all know that I am Killkaties reincarnated as a white rabbit.
Would the real Killkaties please stand up?
Incidentally, Killkaties plays havoc with my spellchecker.
I must apologise for not responding to your comments- my notifications stopped working. Test me now by using the comments button, would you? yes,you.
While floating around as a disembodied head, I stumbled across a copy of my own autobiography and settled down to read.
To me, it sounds like a preposterous load of claptrap.
Villainous nuns bent on ruling the world? Trips to the central circle of Hades? Piratical pursuits for treasure navigated by a schoolgirl buccaneer? (for all of these, see previous posts) Absolute nonsense! In despair, I died at my own hand.. Or rather my own head, rolling myself off the edge of huge mountainous cliff to my death.
Next I found myself re-incarnated as the first Swiss mountain rescue dog, Barry. Raised and trained to assist mountaineers in the Swiss alps, I managed to rescue 40 mountaineers before the 41st shot me as a wolf, which may seem unlikely but is entirely true. Just ask Google if you don’t believe me.
My latest incarnation is as a rabbit: white, fully clothed and carrying an outsize pocket watch. Sorry that I can’t stay longer but I’m already terribly late…
By some strange quirk of fate, I appear to have been reincarnated as myself (albeit myself in an alternate reality).
In this strange existence, I am not a brigand or buccaneer. I seem able to perform acts that are for the good of mankind as a whole. Now where’s the fun in that?
Worst of all, though, is the bizarre new colour of my headgear.
…although the fact that I am an unconnected floating head is a little strange too…
Bisected by a samurai sword, assasinated… luckily this time I’m back as a duck and so won’t be the target of such vicious attacks.
I can’t wait to learn how to fly.
Well, the last re-incarnation was a bit of a flop but I think I’m going to be okay this time.
I’m an Archduke! I’m called Franz Ferdinand (just like the band)!
Best of all I’ve escaped an assassination attempt so surely I’m in the clear!
Earlier this morning I was out with my dear wife in our chaufer-driven limousine, enjoying the sights of Sarajevo when some fool threw a grenade at us. Luckily his aim was not true and he ended up detonating the poor couple in the car behind!
Naturally, we continued on to the soiree at the Governor’s house. Great fun. My wife insists that we should go and visit the survivors of this morning’s attack at the hospital so it’s back to the car we head now…. I suppose we should let the bodyguards know about the changed itinerary but I’m sure everything will be fine without them.
Auf wiedersehen, Freunde!
A few words on the last post here…
Thank you for kind comments about the rich red background colour. What I didn’t mention at the time was that this was a massive pool of my blood following a samurai attack. I’m really not enjoying the way this reincarnation thing is going.
It would seem also that I was tossed into a different timeline where I didn’t live long enough to become the fine handsome gentleman that I once was.
Next time I hope to come back as someone who will come to be famed for their longevity.
Why no picture today?
Well through ectoplasmic concentration and beyond-the-grave powers of telekinesis, I had produced a splendid artwork made from boxes and featuring elephants made of jelly.
Sadly word of this work reached the ears of a gang of international art thieves and it was gone within minutes.
Well, it would appear that I was the ghost all along!
Sucked up and busted by the plasma beam, it would appear that am now free to explore time and space, being reincarnated as I travel on the karmic wheel.
It seems only fair that bad karma comes back to me after my merciless life of brigandry. I have returnd asmyself in the 1970s… Whatever next?
A slight miscalculation there. The spectre-ometer was showing readings of a high level of paranormal activity and so I flipped the switch on the ghost trap.
Unfortunately for me, I’m the one caught by the trap. Also it seems that there is no longer any paranormal,activity being recorded in the area.
I don’t believe it though. Well, whoooOOoo would?
PS if anyone finds a curly moustache, it’s mine. I seem to have lost it at some point in the last couple of days…
I think I may have an explanation for the fact that I was unharmed by the piercing blades.
This explanation though is almost beyond belief.
Simply put, they are ghostly pirates wielding ghostly weapons.
So it’s on with the Proton Pack and time to get busting those ghosts!
Our dear mayor appears to have emerged unscathed from multiple stabbings.
Would any of our readers care to offer their thoughts on how this could be possible? You know where the comments button is, go ahead and use it.