It was 50 years ago today

Today is the 50th anniversary of the release of the first single (which is kind of like an mp3 but made out of plastic and with a hole in the middle) by British pop combo The Beadles (who were kind of like One Direction but not hatched in a test tube).

The Beadles were 4 brothers from Hartlepool who aimed to conquer the world with their beat-driven music. Central to this was eldest brother Bingo who could hit his drums more powerfully than anyone on the planet.

Younger brothers Don, Paws and Jaw were triplets and didn’t really do very much in the band except squabble.

People would often burst into tears upon hearing the band play and then scream hysterically in a vain attempt to drown out their powerful 5 watt amplifiers.

Their first (and only) single, Lovely Do was subject to a compulsory purchase order by the British Noise Abatement society who burned all copies in a celebratory bonfire when Don was crucified for claiming that the Beadles were more popular than cheeses.

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Don, pictured thinking about stilton.

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