Things seem to be going swimmingly at the Valentine’s Day disco… looks as though someone may have been at the communion wine though.
The nuns’ speed-dating evening didn’t prove fruitful. 360 nuns (plus one killjoy chaperone) but just the one man… A beleaguered vicar




  1. I had to dress as a nun once, on the hottest day of the year. I reckon they have aircon under their habits.

    Plus, did you know that vicars make those dog collars by cutting up strips of Fairy Liquid bottles (or at least the one my mum & I met on holiday did)? The chambermaid kept throwing them away each morning when she cleaned his room & he nearly ran out of his supply…

    PS Do rock ‘n’ roll loving nuns wear wimple-pickers?

    1. An interesting picture you paint… And how many collars does the average vicar get per bottle …and why did that vicar not tell the chamber maid not to throw his collars away?
      … Hold on! Vicars? Chambermaids? Are you sure this wasn’t juust a 1970s bedroom farce?

      1. Drat, I wondered why the window cleaner was hiding in my wardrobe. He’d torn his trousers off when he fell from his ladder whilst peeking into the bathroom, just as my husband’s boss came round unexpectedly for dinner accompanied by ten Japanese businessmen. They need a gourmet slap-up meal & no offensive Western behaviour that might offend them in any way, else they won’t place that huge order the firm’s depending on.

        And I’m not even married!

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